Why, someone please tell me, for I'm dying to know,
 did the designers, people who should know better because they build the damn things,
 put wrong buttons, those buttons you Really don't want to press atany time,
 in the Wrong places, where their easily accesable?
Please.
Someone.
Anyone.

I mean, there you are, flying along in your Hulk, or whatever, because it really doesn't matter what you're flying, but for the sake of agument just take it that you're flying or else my point is moot if you, just as an example, are drinking in a station pub while your ship lies safely docked and powered doen in the port... you get my drift...

So, there you are, flying along at lightspeed, hyperspeed, pladspeed, whatever, the speed doesn't really matter, just as long as youy're flying at any speed, for hanging perfectly still in space can also be considdered as flying, but that's beside the point...

Again, so there you are, nicely flying along at anyspeed, when suddenly you notice, because you always suddenly notice things, never something comes along that you slowly notice, it's not like your eye will go for something like hey, well now, soon that light will go on and fleash red any time now, oh yes, there it is... but I'm getting of the subject...

Sign.
Flying along, anyspeed, suddenly notice a light flashing and before you know it you're lying deda-still in your pod and your ship is disappearing on the horison... which isn't really a horison, but in space there is no direction, no up or down, no left or right, so if you turn sideways at any angle, the horizon will be there right before your eyes because it is only measured in your brain as the direct line extended from your two eyes... oh hell...

flying, anyspeed, flashing light, still in od, shp disapearing, yes, out of sight, still going at anyspeed and then you realise your elbow had been resting, just by accident, on the emergency escape button??

WHO THE HELLS PUT THAT BUTTON THERE!
Which moron, idiot, halfwit, brainzombie of a designer thought that right in the elbow room would be a neat place to stick such a botton!

TELL ME!

It just so happened that some cargo needed shifting after a mining op, and so I cloned myself for the occasion and flew a fenrir and a charon all the 12 jumps. Just for fun I raced them against each other and commented it in corp channel.
The original was in dutch, but for you, my loyal fans, I'll translate and embelesh it a bit, as usual. :P

Kyraiela > And the race is off... orca and charon have hit the start-off point at Vullat at the same time, though Charon was already making the turn as Fenrir just exited the station, but hey, this happens. The object is who gets to Mohas first. :D
Kyraiela > Just for the record, both ships run on autopilot on the same processor speed, to keep things fair.
Kyraiela > Annnddd the Fenrir takes the lead right from the get-go to jump into warp first.
Kyraiela > It's a bit of a mash, for as the Charon was already turning, it crossed the Fenrir's exit path, which was followed by a collision throwing the Charon off course in turn. But hey, that's the game, there are no rules. We're just bloody lucky neither ships have guns mounted for else it would be an expensive race.
Kyraiela > The AU of both ships is the same, so it will all hang on the speed the ships can make on the long stretch towards the gate.
Kyraiela > Owwww... disadvantage for teh Charon to exit warp laying sideways and now corrective measures are needed before it can start on the first stretch, while the Fenrir is already zooming at top speed.
Kyraiela > It's a neck on neck race, in which the Fenrir seems to tick just a little faster than the Charon, in expertise to wrangle just a little bit more from the engines. But will they hold, that is the real question.
Kyraiela > It is true though that the Charon will get bonus points for the larger hold it's carrying, so who knows, it might just win on points alone... it's excitement all around.
Kyraiela > Annnddd the Fenrir is the first through the gate!
Kyraiela > Judst at the time that Charon enters through the gate, Fenrir slips into warp, leaving just a trail of dust for Charon to follow. The speeds are amazing, what power and precision, truely it's mastery of both pilots.
Kyraiela > The fenrir seems to be caught in a hard turn at the Onga gate, Charon is closing in on it's heels, but the turn finishes just in time... no... no, wait.. It's Charon who takes the lead now, being first to warp! The is is truely amazing!
Kyraiela > We have no camera view within warp, but it is Fenrir who exited first, we have no idea what happened in there, but as said, theonly rule is that there are no rules and so the excitement continues towards the Gyng gate.
Kyraiela > At this peak of thrills we have to go to commercials for just a little while, but stay tuned for this exiting and amazing death-defing race.
Kyraiela > *followed by three quarters of an hour about toothpaste and female hygene pads*

Kyraiela > Annndd we're back, the race is still on, for those who have just tuned in, this is live, the exciting race between two mammoths of the fleet, the Fenrir and the Charon, from Vullat to Mohas. Let's see how things are at the finishline.
Kyraiela > This is Biff at the finishline and neither ships are still in sight. The crowd is waiting anxiously, many people are together here in the observatory, overseeing the last stretch. The objective is, clearly stated, to enter the station first. Anddd there a dot appears, it's speeding straight for us, could it be... the fenrir or the charon... no, wait, it's just a pod from some low-sec moron. It's an easy mistake to make as the sizes are so absolutely different.
Kyraiela > Well that's all the time we have, stay tuned as we will get who won through into the next show. Thanks for watching and a good night to all.
Kyraiela > *three quarters of an hour about coffee-pads and female hygene pads, followed by a general health hazard message not to get the two mixed up, especially after using.*

Kyraiela > We interrupt this program of 'Recently escaped ciriminals who live near you' for this important message.
Kyraiela > This is sports newscast from around the galaxy, noting that it was indeed the fenrir who finished first. Though the Charon did put up a brave fight, it clearly was no match. But stay tuned, as the rematch of the race will soon start, and this time the ships will be fully loaded just to make a difference, just when our last fan walked out to get parts for his motor-cycle, Hey, we know this isn't much for sports, but it still better than watching soccer or hockey.

Kyraiela > *switches off the screen and pulls out a book from the shelf*

Oh my Goddess... it finally happened. :)

I was contacted by a complete unknown who had read my blog and commented me on it, and I mean in a positive way, for the last oddball started noting that my spelling wasn't all that. Well Frack you, I am dutch by origin and english isn't my native tongue. Just be happy I take the time at all to write to keep you entertained while you mine! Moron!
*takes deep breath*... I've been taking self-helf anger management classes... well.. tapes, but who cares.

But this guy was friendly and nice, we chatted for a while.
Next thing I know I visited a station's sauna and lo and behold, people recognised me! Some even came up to me to ask me if this was me who published this book. On which I pointed to the back of the cover and said I donno, looks like me'... :)
The word spread and finally now I can say I am famous. On one station in one particular place, but still.

Fame.

Adore me.

Worship me.

Now if I can only get the ISK from it to buy a small out of the way station just for myself...

The gall of some people, really... just bluntly asking for ISK like 'I am poor, so pay me your hard-earned money' or the likes... really, if you're poor go work, there's plenty around, I'll even give you a tech 1 mining laser completely free if you'd just shut it and get to it,
Taking people hostage in lowsec for ransom, then shooting the ship and THEN asking for a pod-ransom... sigh. These people should just be strung up by their balls with a piano-string.

But sometimes you really find some treasures, who I award with the prize of 1 ISK, like this one:

Miss valentia > Wow, I was just given a large sum of ISK,.. and I feel like spreading the wealth. :), but I have to have some faith that you're not going to just "take the money and run", so send me some isk for faith, and I'll send you 2x times that back.

Some people you just gotta love, right? :)

When I told people in Paradise I was training (for) an Orca, they game me such curious glances that I dove a little into the history. Apparently some biology geek named a sea-creature after this beautiful ship, but what kind... it's a ferocious flesh-eating waterdweller who likes nothing better than to eat baby seals! My god man! Have some perspective! A true Orca is big, but gentle as it can't carry shit for weapons not mine worth a crap... it's just a nice flagship that when skilled right can give nice bonusses to group-effort mining.
SO to this biologist I'd like to say, get a grip! Instead of diving down into the blue and pesturing water animals, look up into the sky and see what happens overhead in the wonderful world of outer space! What you eat with, eat from, live in, drive in... life here began out there, far far away amongst the stars, where a small group of rag tag fugitive miners try to carve out a piece of the world for themselves. *cue music of the old Battlestar Galactica theme*

*pause*
The Orca is doing fine though. I put in some modifications right from the start to make it more useful to the corp, like cargo rigs, cargo expanders and giant cargo cans to... well.. expand cargo capacity for one.
*unpause - music continues*

*pause*
By the way, she's still at it, without interruptions. I must give credit to those stupid ass Gallente that their endirance seemingly knows no limits.
*unpause - music continues*

*pause*
Don't you just hate people talking right through the credits of your favorite movie? I do...
*unpause*